Sumner Shortcuts

I realize that to some of you readers, that question might as well read as, “Do you want tetanus?”  Of course, to other readers, it’s probably similar to asking if you want cookies.

Yeah, nothing divides the masses quite like religion.

Well, truth be told, we may not have much say in the matter anyway.

If you’ve been in Sumner County for any length of time, then you’re familiar with Trinity Music City.  You probably also know that Trinity Music City is owned by Trinity Broadcasting Network (TBN).

Well, TBN is also the owner of the nation’s only major Bible theme park, called The Holy Land Experience.  Located in Orlando, Florida, The Holy Land Experience is a recreated Jerusalem, where actors portray period characters and certain Biblical events are reenacted. There aren’t really any rides, as much as there are… well… “experiences.”  “Hurry kids, or we’ll miss the daily reenactment of the crucifiction.  Then we’ll all go get a funnel cake!”

Anyway, TBN is thinking long and hard about transplanting some of the Holy Land Experience attractions to the Trinity Music City campus.

Sweet.  Now the teenagers will have one more option for a Friday night hang out activity:

1. run amuck at the movie theater
2. family fun center bumper bowling
3. Bible them park

Which one will your child choose?

Look… if the Simpsons has taught us anything–and I’m not claiming it has–it’s that Bible-based theme parks do not work.